One of the biggest obstacles to progress in your business is not a lack of knowledge or skill. It is a fear of asking for help. And I get it. When you are building something on your own, there is a natural tendency to feel like you should be able to figure it all out by yourself.
But that mindset will cost you months of wasted time if you let it.
The Try-Fail-Ask Framework
Here is the approach I have come to rely on after years of building my online business: push hard toward whatever you are trying to accomplish. Give it your genuine best effort. And if you cannot get it done after a real attempt, accept that you are stuck and ask someone who knows more than you for help.
This is not the same as giving up at the first sign of difficulty. The “push hard” part matters. You learn the most by wrestling with a problem yourself first. The struggle builds understanding, even when it does not produce a solution. And when you do finally ask for help, you can articulate exactly where you are stuck, which makes it much easier for someone else to assist you.
Why We Resist Asking
Most people resist asking for help because of pride or fear. They worry about looking incompetent. They feel like asking is an admission of failure. Or they assume nobody would want to help them.
The reality is almost always the opposite. Most people who are experienced in your area are happy to help when they see someone who has genuinely tried and gotten stuck. What frustrates experts is not being asked for help. It is being asked by someone who clearly has not tried anything on their own first.
Getting Better at Asking
The first time you ask for help, it might feel uncomfortable. That is normal. But like any skill, it gets easier with practice. Here are a few tips:
- Be specific. “Can you help me?” is vague. “I am trying to set up email automation in ConvertKit and the trigger sequence is not firing — here is what I have configured” gives someone enough context to actually help you.
- Show your work. Explain what you have already tried. This demonstrates effort and respect for the other person's time.
- Choose the right person. Ask someone who has actual experience with your specific problem, not just anyone who is available.
- Return the favor. When you can help someone else in the future, do it. Building a network of mutual support is one of the most valuable things you can do as an entrepreneur.
The Bottom Line
Grinding away in isolation on a problem that someone else could help you solve in minutes is not persistence. It is stubbornness, and it is expensive. Push hard, do your best, and when you hit a wall, have the courage to ask. You will be amazed at how much faster you make progress.
For more on building resilience and getting unstuck, listen to the Late Night Internet Marketing Podcast.
